Who, me?

I know I know. I disappeared again. Hey, its beginning of a new quarter. I just had a fabulous break. I need time to get back in the schedule. Give me a break! My calendar is already showing busy schedules for next two months! And then I went for my Karate class yesterday..after 3 weeks of no exercise. Each and every joint in the body is screaming in pain. And I have to finish my code and get it running before I leave. And still I am writing this post. High form of Procrastination..

Anyway, coming back to school also means catching up with friends. So I wasted, no spending time with friends can't be a waste so utilized, approximately two hours for the process. So there I was happily chatting with my friends when a very enthusiastic person who is happy to be pushing the limits of science, drops by. And somehow, according to her, we all should be happy and excited about doing such a great job of moving the barriers of science a little bit further for the humanity! Not that her enthusiasm wasn't admirable but please spare me.

She actually reminded me of my first class in Stanford. The Prof started with how we all are going to become "World-Class" scientists. My first ever class in Stanford and I am thinking, 'That doesn't sound like me.' He was still going on about how it is our responsibility to lead the scientific community. 'Definitely not me'. And how the world look up to us. 'Ok, thats it. Admission committee has made a huge mistake. I DON'T BELONG HERE'.

Honestly, even after three and the half years, I am not sure whether I actually belong here. I am moving no barriers, pushing no limits. I am a very simple person with very few ambitions like getting my green belt in Kenpo Karate before I graduate from here. And all I want to do, right now, is to get this stupid code running so that I can go home and sleep. What limit and what barrier? I don't want to lead no one and I don't want anyone looking up to me. Just leave me alone!

P.S.: Ms. Rowling, can I borrow the invisibility cloak from your imaginary world? I can really use one...